Lent Devotional: Complaint

“The Psalms are, in a sense, God’s way of holding space for us. They invite us to rejoice, wrestle, cry, complain, offer thanks, and shout obscenities before our Maker without self-consciousness and without fear.”

Rachel Held Evans
Inspired: Slaying Giants, Walking on Water, and Loving the Bible Again

There’s a common misconception that to be “a good Christian” means to always be nice and happy, careful to not make waves. It’s okay to be fully human, including feeling all of our emotions. I believe we are also called to speak out against injustice and to make a difference.

The Psalms model for us that we are called to lament about our pain and cry out in the face of injustices. God is big enough to handle our cries of pain, anger and doubt. God is big enough to stand with us when we speak up to help the oppressed. God is big enough to handle our complaints about God’s very self. See Psalm 13 for an example:

“How long, Lord? Will you forget me forever?

   How long will you hide your face from me?

 How long must I wrestle with my thoughts

    and day after day have sorrow in my heart?

    How long will my enemy triumph over me?

Look on me and answer, Lord my God.

    Give light to my eyes, or I will sleep in death,

 and my enemy will say, “I have overcome him,”

    and my foes will rejoice when I fall.

But I trust in your unfailing love;

    my heart rejoices in your salvation.

 I will sing the Lord’s praise,

    for he has been good to me.”

Psalm 13 NIV (via Biblegateway)

Prayer:

God, you know the pains, doubts, anger and fear in my life. You know the world’s deepest suffering. I lament the suffering in the world! I trust in your unfailing love and ask for your guidance to make a difference. In Jesus’ name. Amen.

Reflection Questions: What does it mean to you that God can handle all of your emotions, even your complaints? Who “holds space” for you, giving you a time and place to be genuine? How can you hold space for others?

Haiti Mission: Day 4 – Water Filters, Home Visits and meeting the village

Our day began with Haitian coffee on the porch & breakfast, followed by preparing 40 buckets for our first day of water filter demonstrations.

Each bucket is labeled with the mission team and date so there is a record of when the filter went into service.

Richard

The 2+ hour long water filter classes are arranged by the local church and taught by our translator team members. Other than helping out and being willing to drink the safe, filtered water, the Americans fade into the background as much as possible. (Linda served as our “Vanna White” and helped hold up posters.)The water filters are an outreach project of the local Mellier Methodist Church, and we are blessed to partner with them.

Lamaire and Linda lead the class

After lunch, our team filled snack bags for the school children here. (It got very hot this afternoon so we rested in the cool building in the hottest part of the day.)

In the late afternoon, we were guided by church leader Richard around the village to check on filters distributed by earlier teams.

In the evening, we played with children – so many wonderful children!

We are looking forward to another full day tomorrow. Thanks for taking time to read about our mission trip.

I wish this kind of work was free to do. Each water filter system we bring to the families of Haiti costs approximately $35, our sporting equipment and VBS supplies add up…if you feel led to contribute, please consider donating through this link. Your support is deeply appreciated. Thank you!

Haiti Mission – Day 3

Our morning started with a Methodist worship service – 2 beautiful hours of singing, praying and listening in French and Creole. Our sermon was on the body of Christ – what a beautiful setting to be reminded that ALL of God’s children are valued in the Body of Christ.

About 200 people filled the pews today. A surprise before worship was the chirping of of a baby chick inside the church:

After a lunch of Mamba peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, we headed out in a “tap tap” (a Haitian style taxi) to see a little more of Haiti:

I’ll post videos of Haitians driving when I get to a space with more internet capabilities.

It’s evening now – time for bucket showers and nighttime devotional time. Tomorrow we begin our water filter program with VBS-type time in the afternoon.

God is alive and at work – so evident in the deeply moving worship, infectious laughter and community of hospitality. We thank you for your continued prayers and support!

If you are reading this and want to support the ministry of bringing clean water to Haiti, please consider donating to through this link.

Fearfully and Wonderfully – a sermon on Psalm 139

Based on Psalm 139, this is the sermon that I preached on Sunday, June 3, 2018, at New World United Methodist Church, Arlington, Texas. You can listen to the sermon online on the church’s website.

Introduction

tree original mixed media erin sloan jacksonOn April 29th, our congregation wrapped up the Healthy Church Initiative weekend. After our consulting team’s four prescriptions were read (including the one that could mean I will begin preaching regularly), we were walking out the door. A church member caught me on the way out and said offhandedly, “Well, I guess we’re going to get to know you a lot better.” 

Oh. I’d considered how my work schedule would be impacted by the change, but I hadn’t thought of it that way. Yes, I imagine as I write sermons and share bits from my life from here and there, you will get to know me better.

I went home and shared that comment with my husband that night over dinner, and his reaction was great: “Oh yes, they’ll definitely get to know more about you…and if I mess anything up they’ll probably hear about me, and they’ll get to know stories about the kids. Every time one of us messes up or says something funny, you’ll be thinking, “oh, that’ll preach.”” (I may or may not have already threatened one of my kids that he was about to become a sermon illustration…)

So I’m not so sure how I feel about all that sharing. I’m pretty introverted, but most of my family is not. I know that my bigger kids are a little mortified about their lives being exposed from the pulpit.

But that did get me to thinking… What is it about sharing about our personal lives that made us so uncomfortable? Why did we all have basically the same reaction?

We will take a look at what it means to be known, what keeps us from wanting to be known, and what it means for us as a community of faith to know one another.

Today’s Psalm reading, Psalm 139, is one of my favorite passages of Scripture – it’s my go-to passage for my art and prayer workshops. As I move through the sermon this morning, I invite you to open to the Scripture in a Bible or the New Living Translation version on your smartphone so you can follow along.

What does it mean to be known?

Psalm 139 begins with Verse 1: “O Lord, you have examined my heart and know everything about me.”

There are a couple of ways to look at this word. It’s pretty common today to be satisfied with being “known” in the sense that people know your name, your image, they recognize you.

Instagram as a career

In fact, I learned recently that some people have made a lucrative career just out of being “Instagram known.” Instagram is a social media application that allows you to post and share photos. Like other social media, you can follow your favorite Instagrammers to see their latest posts & people can follow you back. The app keeps track of how many followers you have. You know you’re a cool kid if you have more people following you than you are following.

If you’re a professional Instagrammer though, you can capitalize on having a high number of followers. People who have more than 100,000 followers are considered “macro influencers” by savvy marketers and are often paid by companies to visit their businesses and post about it.

Once these influencers get into the range of about 400-500K followers, they can make something like $3-6K for a single sponsored post. This is one way of being known – in the sense of being famous or recognizable.

But what you are seeing in the photos isn’t even real. What you don’t see is the effort behind the photo. They are seated at tables with ideal lighting. There may be strategically placed beautiful people in the shots trying to make the venue look cool without looking like it was a staged photo. People may even come with their own makeup and lighting crew, use a professional photographer, then airbrush the photo to create that perfect Instagram moment the brands want.

So…if you want to go ahead and follow me on Instagram right now, I’ve only got about 400,000 more followers to go.

Culture of putting image first

So, we live in a culture permeated with the pressure to project our best images out to the world. This pressure has always been around (consider even Adam and Eve tried to pull one over on God), but Social media in general has intensified the pressure and given us a platform for choosing what images we share – including the humble-brag highlights of our weeks peppered with a few carefully filtered pictures of the food we eat. Through this lens, we live in to these roles as caricatures rather than sharing our true character. Your likeness… your image… is made known rather than your character.

It is really easy to live our lives in this safe, superficial mode of relating to one another. The problem is – if we live our lives at this level, we are missing out on the essential part of being in community in one another.

There is a different meaning of the word “known”

The Psalm continues: “You know my thoughts even when I’m far away…You know what I’m going to say even before I say it, O Lord…such knowledge is too wonderful for me; too great for me to understand.”

There is a different meaning of the word “known” that deep down we all long for. It’s a messier, more vulnerable kind of being known that goes much deeper. It requires a willingness to let people in to see your junk, to let people know your struggles, your sin patterns, and even your heartaches.

Methodism’s founder John Wesley formed small groups that developed deep community through hard questions like “How is it with your soul?” and “Am I consciously or unconsciously creating the impression that I am better than I am? In other words, am I a hypocrite?” Wesley seems to have realized that we all crave this kind of community where we are known, but it’s a practice we are tempted to hold at arm’s length.

What keeps us from being known in this way?

This kind of being known requires that we risk rejection, recognize our worthiness, and put forth the effort.

Fear of rejection

A primary fear that keeps things superficial is a fear of rejection. We don’t let people get to know us because we are afraid they will discover something about us that they won’t like and they may reject us.

Even clergy writing sermons are tempted to keep sermons safe and unobjectionable because of the fear that people will leave the church if their toes get stepped on. (for the record, you don’t have to always agree with what I say in my sermons, but please don’t reject me….)

Sense of unworthiness

A second fear that keeps us from being known is a fear of being unworthy. It is tempting to believe at times that you are somehow not worthy of being known and loved by others. I love how this Psalm reminds us that each of us are “fearfully and wonderfully made; wonderful (or marvelous) are God’s works.” God’s character goes into the creation of every person. When you feel worthless, or even begin to hate yourself, you can remember that God’s spirit is ready and willing to work within you.

You are worth knowing. Every person with whom you lock eyes is also worth knowing.

Distraction/Too Busy

A third barrier to knowing one another is that we are just too busy to put forth the effort. With so much to do all the time, it’s a lot easier to just be friendly than to really be in community. Honestly, it’s a lot of work to get to the point that you are really known. Just think of how we greet each other with niceties like “How are you?” “Fine, you?” It takes more work to think about how you really might be feeling, and even more work and risk to share that information with other people.

To really get to know one another takes time, listening, and sharing life with one another. It’s easier and quicker to make sweeping assumptions about how other people are based on the boxes we put people in like politics, race, gender and education, than it is to really get to know one another as fellow human beings.

The question to consider is, which fears and excuses are you willing to give up in order to risk being known?

What does it mean that God knows us so well?

How well God knows us

How well does God know us? God knows us completely. God has examined our hearts and knows everything about us. God knows us in minute detail, God knows the number of hairs on our head. As the Psalmist reminds us, God is inescapable and always with us, even in our dark and secret places.

God has been with us from the very beginning, since before we were even knit together in our mother’s wombs. God is never going to abandon us.

God is a faithful & trustworthy knower

Although God knows us completely with a knowledge that is “too wonderful” for us to comprehend…God still abides with us and loves us.

What we can learn from this is: God is a faithful and trustworthy knower.

God also wants to be completely known by us. John Wesley preached on a concept he called “spiritual respiration” or breathing. Just as we must have breath in order to live, we must have God as part of our existence in order to be spiritually alive. A challenge with this is that, unlike breathing, to be in relationship with God takes conscious effort on our part. We can grow to a point of deep community with God through developing habits like regular prayer, Scripture study, and life in Christian community. We can grow to a point of deep community with one another through developing habits like praying for one another, studying Scripture together, and working toward really knowing and understanding each other.

Conclusion

Words of hope and a Call to action

As people of faith, we are also called to grow to a point of deep community with the all of our brothers and sisters in Christ. As Rev. Joseph Nader reminded us last week, we each have unique and important gifts and talents to bring to the Body of Christ. As a community, we need to know one another and to allow ourselves to be known. As a group of people with diverse views on a lot of subjects, we have a beautiful opportunity to model healthy Christian community. I challenge you to take someone out to lunch and get to know one another. It’s worth the risk. And as we move forward as a faith community no matter the results of today’s vote, we can have full confidence that God is present even as we venture in to uncharted territory.* My prayer for each of us is that we be willing to see the image of God in one another.

Let us pray:

O Lord who searches and knows us, we praise you for your constant presence and love in our lives. We are reminded today that there is no darkness we can encounter, no circumstance we can face, no place we may venture, no choice we may make that can separate us from your complete, all-encompassing love for us. Help us to lean into remembering that you, God, are always with us. Help us to risk getting to know one another so that we can be the kind of people who are known for how we love you, love one another, and strive to be your disciples. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

 

Discussion:

What key takeaways do you have from this message? What keeps you from being known by others? Who do you know that needs to hear this message?

 —-

*Later in the day on June 3, New World’s congregation voted 133-3 to adopt and move forward with the Healthy Church Initiative prescriptions. Go to nwumc.org to learn more about New World United Methodist Church.

Giving credit where credit is due: Scripture links are to the New Living Translation version of the Psalm on Biblegateway.com. Instagram career link is to an article on Elle.com. To learn more about John Wesley’s questions, check out umcdiscipleship.org. Be sure to read up on John Wesley’s sermon too. Follow me on Instagram @erinjackso.

Thanks for visiting and reading all the way to the bottom of the page! I hope you’ll leave a comment. Be blessed!  ESJ

Flood – A Pastoral Prayer

Here is my pastoral prayer from worship today:

God of all creation,

In the beginning, your spirit hovered over the face of the waters. There has not been a time when you have abandoned us.

As we sit here now, the Bible stories we learned as children about great floods have gained new meaning in our lives. We are reminded that, throughout history, you have been faithful to bring your people through floods and across deep rivers.

As we sit here in the safety of this sanctuary, in this dry place, we are reminded of the countless people who are now without shelter of their own. Rain down your comfort and peace on those in need. In the months that come, bring healing to the brokenhearted.

We pray that you will bring out the best of humanity, O Lord, through this crisis. May the hearts of all be softened as we look beyond all the trivial issues which have divided us, and reach for ways to care for one another with your great love. Let the softening of hearts begin within us right now.

When we are faced with storms in our own life, whether it be literal storms or the pains of illness, grief, depression, hurt or loneliness, remind us of your faithfulness. You promise that when we pass through the deep waters, you will be with us. Forgive us when we neglect to depend on you.

We praise you that, from the beginning, you have been the source of living water for us. With hope from you we can dance in the storms.

As your people, lead us to acts of mercy and compassion. Help us to make justice roll down like waters, and  righteousness like an ever-flowing stream.

Well up within us, O Water of Life.

In the name of Christ we pray, Amen.

Finding the Common Ground

“Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable — if anything is excellent or praiseworthy — think about such things.” -Philippians 4:8

Which side are you on? Would you say you are on the left or on the right?

As I look through my Facebook friends, my community, my congregation, my extended family – there is so much pressure to pick a side on all the issues. Which issue concerns you the most today? Racial violence? Discrimination? Gay marriage? Immigration? Refugee Crisis? Climate change? Poverty? Employment? McGregor vs. Mayweather?

No question, one glance at the news and you know there are plenty of reasons to be up in arms about something. There are sides that are right and sides that are wrong. We view the world through our personal perspective and cannot understand how anyone can be outraged in a way that is different than our own flavor of outrage. Clearly, your side is right and the other side is wrong, right? It’s tough when people you genuinely love, family members even, feel compelled to share opinions that seem so hurtful and wrong to you. It’s crazy making when total lies are passed on as truth, and no one seems to be questioning things.

I don’t know about you, but I’m just tired of feeling like I have to pick sides on issues, and feeling I need to be either outraged or fearful all of the time. There are definitely reasons to be outraged. I feel manipulated by the news, whether it’s fake news or real news. It’s just exhausting.

But what if there is another option? What if we don’t have to be divided about everything?

As a pastor, I serve a wide range of people. I mean a crazy wide range of people. In my congregation, I have gun-carrying NRA members sitting near pacifist gun control advocates, LGBTQ couples and allies sitting next to gay rights opponents, self-identified liberals and conservatives…name a division, it’s in my congregation. I tiptoe through this socio-political minefield as a pastor and pray to bring God’s words of hope and truth in a faithful, God-honoring way. I try to find our common ground as humans and Christ followers in the midst of a media culture that is determined to instill fear, hopelessness and division.

Finding common ground is an uphill battle, friends, but not an unsurmountable one.

What is our common ground? We worship a God of hope. A God who promises to never leave us nor forsake us. A God who brings redemption to oppressed people. As Christ followers, we can know the deep peace, love, and grace that is offered freely to us. As forgiven people, we have the power and freedom to resist evil, injustice, and oppression in whatever forms they present themselves. We can be a people of hope in a culture that really needs it.

We also have a beautiful opportunity to love others through trying to understand their perspectives. We don’t have to agree on everything, but we can bring steps closer to reconciliation by opening our hearts and minds to hearing how God is at work in the hearts and minds of others. We can listen to one another for the things that are true, noble, right, pure, lovely and admirable. I’ve found that the more I listen to people who are different, really listen, the more I have to see our common humanity. Divisive “issues” slip away when we see the humanity in others.

Let’s go listen to one another in love.

Blessings,

Erin

  • Who do you need to reach out to in order to understand their struggles better?
  • Who can you invite to coffee/lunch/dinner this week to get to know better?
  • Where do you find hope?

 

A New Space

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It’s time for a fresh start.

Hi, it’s Erin and welcome to my new space for sharing my thoughts, prayers, hopes, dreams, ideas and more.

Why a new blog name? I have a lot of roles in life nowadays – Christ-follower, Wife, Mom of four, artist, United Methodist Deacon, missions pastor, spiritual director, self-care and soul-care advocate, friend, speaker, writer and more, so “UM Youth Worker” just wasn’t covering all of the bases. “Mission and Art” seems to capture more of what I am about.

I don’t know about you, but I believe the world needs more spaces filled with hope. I believe in creating those spaces both within people, and within the world around us.

In this little corner of the internet I hope to share reflections on Scripture, life as a pastor/mom, soul care, life as a deacon called to Word, Service, Justice, Mercy and Compassion, recent mission and ministry adventures, and lots of artwork from mixed media and watercolors to journaling and more. I hope you’ll jump in and have conversations with me in the comments – you’re invited to share your heart here too.

Hope you’ll join me for this journey of both Mission and Art.

Stay tuned for more.

Blessings,

Erin

Inspiration in a Single Bluebird

What inspires you? Here’s a little something that inspired me.

Erin Sloan Jackson Art

I have been enamored with this bird silhouette for a few weeks. It all started as a picture in a book on bluebirds. Longing to master sketching birds, I drew the bird several times in my sketchbook. I just love the freedom of spirit that a bird in flight represents. We really are meant to soar, you know.

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I cut out the sketch I liked best and have been using it as the starting point for three pieces so far:

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I love that a single photograph has transformed into so many versions.

What about you? What inspires you? Which dream are you pursuing?

Blessings,
Erin

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I love you, Lord…But I AM MAD AT YOU!

This is an article I wrote for The YouthWorker Movement, thought I’d put it here on my personal blog, too:

 

Are we failing the students in our youth ministry by teaching them to be too polite to God?

I recently visited a different mainline church’s youth group program.  During the lesson time, the youth pastor asked the opening question, “What are different ways we can pray?”  The room contained a wide range of students from goofy 6th grade boys to mature 12th grade girls, so the maturity of answers varied a little, but the gist was: Prayers in church, silent prayer, singing praises, spending time in nature, prayer with movement, liturgical dance, writing down your prayer, reading the Bible, saying grace at dinner…and so on.

While listening, it occurred to me, all of the prayers we tend to teach and model to youth are very polite, reserved even.  And maybe even a little fake.

When I’m honest, there are times in life when I don’t feel polite at all.  When tragedy strikes and it’s on the news – innocent children murdered while at school, civilian hostages being shot and killed in a Kenyan shopping mall – the emotions I feel are shock, horror, sadness, grief, anger.  When I lost my job, I felt wounded, betrayed, stunned, hurt.  I’ve silently grieved the loss of unborn children lost through miscarriage.  These emotions boiling inside of me are neither polite nor reserved.

Learning to cope with strong, often changing emotions is one of the biggest challenges a teen can face.  If I reflect on my adolescent years, emotions I felt then were similar to the ones I feel now, more intense even.  I clearly recall specific times of anger, pain, grief, doubt, disbelief, betrayal, abandonment and more ugliness.  As a teen, I did not know much beyond my own personal experience and emotions.  What is different for me now is I have a faith mature enough to recognize that, no matter the circumstance, God is still good and God is still in control.  Teens don’t all know that yet.  Is there a way to help them deal with pain and anger and other strong emotions by teaching it is okay to feel these emotions, even to pray toward God with them?

What if we taught that it was okay to be real, to even yell at God?  

Here is how I introduced the concept recently:  In this clip from the classic movie, The Apostle (1997) you can see an entirely different model of prayer, one I know that my United Methodist senior highers had never seen before.  In case you haven’t seen the movie (it’s really good), what you need to know is the main character, Sonny, is a preacher that is a complicated, imperfect character.  He just lost the church he started and his marriage is falling apart.

(Follow this link if the above clip doesn’t play for you: http://youtu.be/q5v5DOEF45E)

I showed this movie clip to my senior high Bible study last week, followed by questions on how they have seen people pray.  Well, no one had even imagined yelling at God before.  In church we tend to focus on the pretty parts of the Bible, but if you take a close look, there is a lot in Scripture about struggle, anger, pain, grief, jealousy and more.  We followed the clip with a Bible lesson on the wide range of emotions found in the book of Psalms, having the youth read to themselves.   Youth reflected on their week, read Psalms from the list in the lesson that spoke to them, prayed and then wrote their own psalm prayer.  (Here is the complete handout I used: How to Use the Bible to Improve Your Prayer Life, adapted from to “Holy Things for Youth Ministry“ by Brian Hardesty-Crouch.)

Maybe United Methodists in general are never going to feel comfortable with actually yelling at God, especially in front of others, but maybe we should.  What I learned through this Bible study is that there are deep emotions going on in the youths’ lives, even on an ordinary Wednesday school night.  We fail our students if we don’t teach them that it is okay to be honest with God.  Sometimes honesty is a painful thing, yes?  By giving a method to pray about their emotions, by giving permission to be honest and to deal with hard things head on, healing and growth begin.  By teaching how the Bible can give practical help in times of struggle, students learn to turn to God’s Word for guidance.   The youth and I also learned that they are creative and can make parts of the Bible their own story.  My prayer for you is that you can model honesty with God, even when the truth hurts.

Blessings,

Erin

Questions:

What other creative ways have you or your church taught about prayer?  About dealing with emotion?

Is there someone you know whose life would be changed if they knew it was okay to yell at God, to release their anger and hurt?

Students Doing Ministry

I am teaching a class this week at the SMU Perkins School of Youth Ministry called “Giving Them the Keys – Creating a Student-Led Ministry Culture.”  The basic idea is that youth directors need to change the way they approach youth ministry altogether.  Instead of youth directors creating programs for youth to attend, youth should be using their gifts and talents for ministry themselves.  I believe students are fully capable and ready to do ministry and a youth director’s job should be to come alongside and coach youth into the youth’s own ministry.

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I am having an amazing experience teaching, but what’s even cooler is the email I received this week from a high school senior named Lara.  A little about her – Lara is one of the mentors in our pilot of Just One Starfish.  This means that once a week Lara volunteers an hour or so to be a mentor and just spend life together as a positive role model for an at-risk upper elementary school girl.  In her own right, Lara is a talented, amazing, wonderful young woman of God.

Lara is also one of the most talented young photographers I’ve ever met.  With this post, I’m giving you a sneak preview of one of the most beautiful photo shoots I’ve ever seen.  The model is Lara’s mentee with the “Just One Starfish” mentoring program.

I think you’ll agree – God is at work here transforming the lives of young people, one person at a time.

This just makes my heart smile and I had to share.